What do you call a hockey team that issues apologies? IKEA.
And where does that happen? Why in Toronto of course, centre-ice for the ‘losing-est’ franchise since the invention of the puck.
It’s said that Don Cherry sheds tears on his high-collared neck every time he walks past the Air Canada Centre when the Leafs are playing. We all know what he’s feeling.
How long has it been since the Maple Leafs won a Stanley Cup? Or even made the playoffs?
It’s been so long the time-scale is geologic: glaciers have melted, the earth’s plates have shifted, dinosaurs (Harold Ballard) have vanished, since any Toronto newspaper could front-page a Leaf victory.
I’ve checked on Wikipedia. The earth was young when the Leafs had men on the team, understood that the purpose of the other team’s net was to shoot pucks into it, when the thought of losing to some American team with Ducks in its name was an unspeakable impossibility.
Think. History buffs may remember these names, from the days before The Fall: Mahovlich, Keon, Armstrong, Horton, Bower. They were the kind of players that made up a team that earned them a word not heard so much in Toronto today: winners.
Winners. The last time that word bruised the lips of anyone around the Air Canada Centre, he was arrested on the double charge of reckless falsehood and criminal optimism.
Aware that Toronto Hockey has equal suspense and less esteem than the city’s annual Duck Regatta, the club’s owners - just back from the piling up the bullion in the counting house - this week decided that after yet another year of empty dreams, flattened hope, crushed expectations and broken hearts they should apologize to the team’s despairing fans (it’s not known if they sent flowers).
They are buying full-page ads of apology. Is this a hockey team, or a band of overpaid flagellants? Did The Rocket apologize? Howe? Hull? Lafleur? Orr? Lemieux? Of course they didn’t. They could play hockey. They were too busy winning.
45 years out of the finals - longer than it took the trees to grow, that supplied them the wood, to make the hockey sticks, they don’t score with. Whole forests have been felled for no real reason.
You apologize after 2 or 3 losses, or even 5 or 6. You do not apologize for a 45-year losing streak. You go into exile, or take up ping-pong, or selling vacuum cleaners. In other words you leave the scene of the country’s worst sport’s crime.
Playing in the country’s biggest city, filling the arena for every losing game and losing season - you don’t need to apologize - you’ve lost the right to apologize. “Sorry” is not something you get to say. “Sorry” is something you’ve become.
BOSTON RUINS A glass pane fell out onto center David Krejci, below left as Bruins players and fans celebrated a 1-0 victory in overtime against the Washington Capitals in Game 1 of a Stanley Cup first-round playoff series in Boston, Thursday. (Photo: Elise Amendola / AP via the Wall Street Journal)
(Source: scottfartsmell)
I’m Brian Burke, general manager of the TO Maple Leafs, and I’m Patrick Burke, scout for the Philadelphia Flyers. Before my brother Brendan passed away in 2010, he was the first person to fight for the rights of gay athletes in professional hockey. Since his accident, our family has fought hard to carry on his legacy and ensure that LGBT athletes around the world are afforded equal opportunity. Judged only by their talent, character, and work ethic in their sport. We are now joined by hockey players from around the world supporting through my son Brendan’s simple message: If you can skate, if you can shoot, if you can score, if you can play; you can play.
![kathowarth:
Clint Malarchuk, Buffalo Sabres goalie after taking a skate to the Carotid Artery on March 22, 1989
Malarchuk, meanwhile, had only two thoughts: He was going to die, and he had to do it the right way. “All I wanted to do was get off the ice”, said Malarchuk. “My mother was watching the game on TV, and I didn’t want her to see me die.”[5] Aware that his mother had been watching the game on TV, he had an equipment manager call and tell her he loved her. Then he asked for a priest.[6]Malarchuk’s life was saved by Jim Pizzutelli, ATC, the team’s athletic trainer and a former army medic who had served in Vietnam. He reached into Malarchuk’s neck and pinched off the bleeding, not letting go until doctors arrived to begin suturing the wound. Still, Malarchuk came within minutes of becoming only the second fatality to result from an on-ice injury in NHL history (the first was Bill Masterton). It was estimated that if the skate hit 1/8 inch higher on Malarchuk’s jugular, he would have been dead within 2 minutes. In the dressing room and on his way to the hospital, doctors spent 90 minutes and used over 300 stitches to close the wound.[6] I](http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lyr8uqQ8nu1qdr069o1_1280.jpg)
Clint Malarchuk, Buffalo Sabres goalie after taking a skate to the Carotid Artery on March 22, 1989
Malarchuk, meanwhile, had only two thoughts: He was going to die, and he had to do it the right way. “All I wanted to do was get off the ice”, said Malarchuk. “My mother was watching the game on TV, and I didn’t want her to see me die.”[5] Aware that his mother had been watching the game on TV, he had an equipment manager call and tell her he loved her. Then he asked for a priest.[6]
Malarchuk’s life was saved by Jim Pizzutelli, ATC, the team’s athletic trainer and a former army medic who had served in Vietnam. He reached into Malarchuk’s neck and pinched off the bleeding, not letting go until doctors arrived to begin suturing the wound. Still, Malarchuk came within minutes of becoming only the second fatality to result from an on-ice injury in NHL history (the first was Bill Masterton). It was estimated that if the skate hit 1/8 inch higher on Malarchuk’s jugular, he would have been dead within 2 minutes. In the dressing room and on his way to the hospital, doctors spent 90 minutes and used over 300 stitches to close the wound.[6] I
(Source: legitimatehypnotist)
Behold, a bunch of men trying not to laugh at a bunch of setups for dick jokes.
HOW DO YOU WRAP YOUR KNOB?
Francesco Carrozzini took this portrait of Sean Avery for Hickey Freeman, and did an excellent job. I don’t think this photo will be a classic. It’s a great ad, but it will drift into history. The part that makes this photo exciting for me is the people that are hating on it. People are finding excuses to trash the clothing Avery is wearing, and that he even did the photo at all, purely because they despise the style of hockey that made him famous. Not to say that they’re wrong. He was one of the NHL’s biggest pests, at a time when hockey was just defining the role of pest. Off the ice, he’s always been fashion-forward, and outspoken on the civil rights of the LGBTQ set, and I think that people who dislike him for waving his stick in a goalie’s face for a whole game are making a big mistake attacking him for the things he does right.
Brian Burke is such a great guy, wether you a fan of him or not. He’s just a great guy. And I think it’s great what he’s trying to do.
“The best thing about my son coming out is I didn’t have to take anything back.”
Brian is an incredible general manager and I’m so impressed with how he uses his position to speak about making the NHL open to players. Bravo, sir.
If this goes well, I’ll do some more contests on here. Probably more Marlies based than Leafs, but lets start this off strong.
This is meant to be mine.
“I am the friend of somebody who experienced depression. I know it isn’t a choice. It’s not a weakness, self-inflicted, or a result of not trying. Sometimes you just can’t get over it - it won’t just go away. Pretending it isn’t happening doesn’t help; talking about it does. Getting support early can make the difference. Helping someone we care about is not a burden. I pledge to learn the signs. I will not judge. I will have compassion. I will reach out, listen, talk, help, and find help. My name is Kevin Bieksa, I will not stay silent.”
- Kevin Bieksa of the Vancouver Canucks for mindcheck.ca
I urge everyone - whether you are a hockey fan or not - to reblog this message. As someone who is dealing with depression, having the proper support makes all the difference. Please educate yourselves; it could save someone’s life.
