Even the rhetoric of the “It Gets Better” campaign pisses me off because it implies that passive acceptance is all that’s needed to combat the oppression of GSMs and that oppression of GSMs only happens for a brief period of your life and if you endure it it will get better.
It doesn’t get better if people passively accept the status quo, it needs to be made better.
The It Get’s Better campaign shouldn’t be focusing on stories telling people to endure and accept, it should be a campaign focusing on telling people to organize, focusing on education, focusing on making it better so that the stories telling people to endure are made irrelevant.
The focus of the campaign is wrong, the rhetoric of the campaign reflects that, and the only people better off from it are the white cis people who were able to capitalize on creating a faux-movement which implies people should accept a status quo of GSM oppression.
The Toronto Maple Leafs discuss homphobia in the National Hockey League and taking strides to create a welcoming environment.
I love this team.
I’m Brian Burke, general manager of the TO Maple Leafs, and I’m Patrick Burke, scout for the Philadelphia Flyers. Before my brother Brendan passed away in 2010, he was the first person to fight for the rights of gay athletes in professional hockey. Since his accident, our family has fought hard to carry on his legacy and ensure that LGBT athletes around the world are afforded equal opportunity. Judged only by their talent, character, and work ethic in their sport. We are now joined by hockey players from around the world supporting through my son Brendan’s simple message: If you can skate, if you can shoot, if you can score, if you can play; you can play.
Republican Chokes Up At Gay Marriage Debate In Washington (by BuzzFeed)
Rep. Maureen Walsh understands and speaks from the heart. We can learn so much from this woman. Sam
Continuing on my theme of beautiful and wonderful things on the blog today, you MUST watch this video. This woman is beautiful. If you cry at these things like I do, you may want to get the tissue ready. ~ Kim
I assume this was the lady Ipo was talking about? Amazing.
Yes! She responded to my email!
This speech is so beautiful. I teared up over her passion and honesty. Incredible words, Representative Walsh.
Every single time someone makes a post about how all m/m is fetishizing and anyone who writes it is a cesspool of internalized misogyny I just have to laugh. There are definitely some problematic aspects of m/m slash and definitely some people who do (some admittedly) fetishize m/m relationships. If you do the stuff on this list, you should probably check yourself. Hard.
- Do you tell everyone that you hope your children are gay men so you can ship them with their friends?
- Do you ignore and/or vilify the lady characters?
- Do you ignore the men of color because you think only white men are attractive and interesting?
- Do you ship two attractive white dudes, and only two attractive white dudes, in everything?
- Have you ever asked who the woman is in a relationship between two men? Do you designate a male character the “woman” in the relationship? This is not okay because the whole like, point of a relationship between two gay dudes is that we are, you know, dudes.
- Do you call gay men in relationships that are not part of the yaoi subgenre “seme” and “uke”? On that note, do you make a huge deal out of stuff like “Who tops?” This is a really silly thing to do! Some gay men who have anal have a preference one way or another, some don’t. Sexual preferences are not always dictated by personality traits, either! Some men who paint their nails prefer to top, and some lumberjacks prefer to bottom.
- Do you put anal sex on a pedestal as the only kind of “real” sex two men can have? A lot of gay men don’t even have anal sex.
- Do you think that “true love” is between two men because ladies are gross?
- If there is a feminine male character who shows canon interest in women, have you decided that he has to be gay?
- Do you say that you are a “gay man in a woman’s body”? Please stop saying that. Queer trans* men are, you know, literally gay men trapped in women’s bodies, and they have to face a pretty fair amount of adversity for that! Claiming to be a gay man in a woman’s body because you like to read and write about gay men is trivializing that. Please don’t do it.
- Do you see a picture of two gay men walking down the street and freak out about it? I mean, like, we do that. We do stuff! We’re people. We do things like walk down the street and eat food. There’s no reason to make a huge deal out of that!
If you answered no to these questions, then I am pretty sure you don’t need to check yourself. I don’t think anyone with a lick of sense is going to argue that there is a lot of misogyny in fandom, internalized or otherwise. But occasionally enjoying m/m is not an infallible indicator of internalized misogyny.
A lot of people who enjoy m/m and f/f are, you know, queer people. Queer men, queer women, queer non-binary folks. It is not fetishizing for queer folks to want to read and write about queer people. Whenever this argument comes up, we are always the ones left out. It is always a strongly worded letter to the Evil Fangirls.
It is entirely possible for a lady, queer or otherwise, to write respectful fanfiction about gay men that normalizes gay relationships. This actually like, happens a lot. While I don’t think there’s anything wrong with being shallow as long as your version of shallow doesn’t exclude marginalized groups, I am pretty sick of seeing ladies who like m/m in any aspect being repeatedly dismissed as a bunch of screaming and woman hating fangirls unable to think critically about material. What was that about misogyny again?
It’s a time-honored tradition at Navy homecomings – one lucky sailor is chosen to be first off the ship for the long-awaited kiss with a loved one.
Today, for the first time, the happily reunited couple was gay.
The dock landing ship Oak Hill has been gone for nearly three months, training with military allies in Central America.
As the homecoming drew near, the crew and ship’s family readiness group sold $1 raffle tickets for the first kiss. Petty Officer 2nd Class Marissa Gaeta bought 50 - which is actually fewer than many people buy, she said, so she was surprised Monday to find out she’d won.
Her girlfriend of two years, Petty Officer 3rd Class Citlalic Snell, was waiting when she crossed the brow.
They kissed. The crowd cheered. And with that, another vestige of the policy that forced gays to serve in secrecy vanished.
By Corinne Reilly
© December 21, 2011
To Chick-Fil-A, Truett Cathy, and the WinShape Foundation:
It is with a heavy heart that I write to you saying that I can no longer, in good conscience, patronize your establishment. Nor can I partake of your delicious, succulent, juicy chicken.
I mean, I would like to. Oh trust me, I would! But the beef (ha!) I have with you isn’t about your chicken. Your chicken is actually quite good. Your ongoing support of anti-gay organizations and hate groups, however, is what has left me with a bad taste in my mouth.
I had deduced that your business was religious - meaning I noticed it was always closed on Sundays and I just sort of guessed. And that’s fine. I live in Oklahoma and I know plenty of Christian businesses who do the same thing. That much never bothered me.
I never really knew what Chick-Fil-A’s opinion of gays was, but I probably wouldn’t have cared. You are free to have whatever rampantly bigoted views you choose to hold, and I have the right to call them just that. If one of the Chick-Fil-A cows were a homophobe, I’d hope he’d have the common courtesy to at least keep that to himself and we would be fine.
But then you had to do it to me. You just had to push me away. You went and donated $2 million, money that customers like me helped you make, to anti-gay organizations like the Pennsylvania Family Institute. These are people who have said that striking down Prop 8 was a direct hit to human civilization. They’ve said same-sex marriage threatens children, hurts families, and punishes society by caving in to a radical sexual revolution.
I’ve checked your tab, and apparently that’s not the only anti-gay organization you support:
- Marriage & Family Legacy Fund: $994,199
- Focus On The Family: $12,500
- Exodus International: $1,000
Oh, that Exodus International one is a low blow, Chick-Fil-A, because that group’s entire purpose is to eliminate and “cure” homosexuality like it’s a mental disorder.
And then you sent out a message saying you’re not anti-gay and that you respect LGBT people. But then, well, this:
That’s an odd definition of respect. And you’re absolutely sure you’re not anti-gay?
Come on, just admit you don’t like me. It’s pretty obvious. You’ve given money to organizations who are actively trying to make sure I don’t get to enjoy the same rights as heterosexual couples. You have helped fund hate groups who, according to the Southern Poverty Law Center, are listed right alongside the KKK.
So I think you’ve made it pretty clear how you feel. Now here’s how I feel.
I refuse to spend my money at a business that supports hate, and I encourage others to do the same.
Maybe you think a small number of people boycotting won’t make much of a difference. And, you know, that may be true.
But when I think that even so much as a penny, a single freaking penny of my money went to Exodus International and helped fund their sick, perverse practices of “curing” gay people, it breaks my heart.
It makes me physically ill to think that a single cent of the money I paid to eat your chicken goes to a hate group who clearly disagrees with my very existence. And when I think, even for a second, that I have in any way helped a group who is trying to undermine my civil rights… well, it makes me want to puke.
And suddenly, I’m not so hungry anymore. No matter how tasty the chicken might be.
But hey, if you meant what you said about not being anti-gay, and if you’re half as Christian as you claim to be, then I’ve got a proposition for you.
Homelessness among LGBT youths is rampant, and charities and churches all over America are struggling to provide them with food, shelter, and a positive environment. Even if you think their sexual orientation is a choice, they are still human beings - and they are suffering.
Here’s one organization that could sure use some help:
And even if you don’t feel like giving a monetary donation… I bet those homeless teens could really go for some free chicken.
Just a thought.
I certainly hope that you have read all of this and heard me out. I also hope that, one day, I may again enjoy one of your chicken sandwiches with extra pickles and waffle fries. It was my favorite!
Until Chick-Fil-A stops supporting these hate groups, however, my morals will simply not allow it.
Sign the petition!
One of the indispensable resources in the assembly of GQ’s recent oral history about being a gay man in the U.S. military was an organization called OutServe, which operates a private “social network” for gay servicemen and women who were forced to live in silence under DADT. Today, on the occasion of the policy’s official repeal, OutServe’s founder, JD Smith, at long last publicly dropped his pseudonym in an article appearing in The New York Times. Everyone, meet Air Force Lieutenant Josh Seefried:
Now it can be told: A prominent gay rights advocate who called himself J. D. Smith is in fact 1st Lt. Josh Seefried, a 25-year-old active-duty Air Force officer. At 12:01 a.m. Tuesday, he dropped the pseudonym, freed from keeping his sexual orientation secret like an estimated tens of thousands of others in the United States military.
“I always had the feeling that I was lying to them and that I couldn’t be part of the military family,” said Lieutenant Seefried, who helped found an undercover group of 4,000 gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender active-duty service members. “I feel like I can get to know my people again. When I go to a Christmas party, I can actually bring the person I’m in a relationship with. And that’s a huge relief.”
Yesterday, board member Steve Zimmer out-gayed the rest of the state’s school districts — even San Francisco Unified; woot woot! — with the state’s first solid plan to implement SB 48.
Under his resolution, all schools within LAUSD must do the following in their classrooms within three months:
- Promote positive images of LGBT individuals.
- Make available age-appropriate LGBT inclusive curriculum for elementary and secondary schools.
- Require that newly adopted social studies materials include positive representations of LGBT and persons with disabilities.
- Include LGBT sensitivity in outreach, education, and training for students, parents, and staff.
- Remind staff of their duty to ensure that all students are safe and affirmed on campus, and to proactively intervene with acts of bias, harassment or bullying that they see, including, but not limited to LGBT-biased language and bullying.
- Implement for all staff a training specifying legal responsibilities, effective practices, and concerns unique to LGBT individuals, similar to the district’s child abuse module.
LAUSD’s human relations coordinator, Judy Chiasson, tells the LA Daily News elementary-schoolers with same-sex parents will now “be allowed to make two Mother’s or Father’s Day cards without questions or concerns being raised by teachers.”
Michele Bachmann’s foot, meet Michele Bachmann’s mouth. Read more excerpts from the “Marriage Vow” she signed, along with action pics, here.
I got nothing.